BIG BOX GUY
Services
Full-service box appreciation for individuals, couples, and organizations of any size. We work with every box. Tight, wide, deep, slightly damp. We mean every box.
Box Consulting
Our consultants will look at your box, up close, and tell you what we see. (It's beautiful. It's perfect. Don't change a thing.) Engagements typically last one box, sometimes all night.
Box Storage
Secure, climate-indifferent storage for your box. We will hold it. Carefully. With both hands. For as long as you need. We're in no rush, and neither is she.
Enterprise Box
Big box for big needs. Includes a dedicated box manager, quarterly box reviews, and a box you will not forget. Nobody forgets the big one.
Box-as-a-Service
Access box from anywhere. Open it in the cloud. Open it on your phone. Open it at 2 a.m. with the lights off. We don't judge.
Managed Unboxing
We open your box for you. Slowly. With both hands. We find the flap. We work it loose. 24/7 coverage. Mean time to box: as long as she needs.
Box Hardening
Additional tape. Up to two strips. Our most secure boxes take three tries to get into, and they are worth every one. Tight is good.
Box-to-Box
We introduce your box to other boxes. Long ones, short ones, a surprisingly wide one. Everyone gets along. Nobody gets jealous. It's a box thing.
Certification
Become a Certified Big Box Guy. Love one hundred boxes. All the way. There is no exam. The boxes are the exam. You will pass, eventually, with practice.
Box Support
Having trouble with your box? Our support team will ask if you have tried opening it. Gently. From the top. From the other side. With a little spit on the tape.
Our process
- Discovery. We receive a box.
- Assessment. We admire it. Every side. We run a hand along the edge. We take our time.
- Delivery. We open it. Carefully. With consent, three times if it's taped. We get all the way in.
- Review. We lie there and think about it for a while afterward. Our process has no step five. It doesn't need one.
Who we serve
Shipping, moving, retail, cats, and anyone who has ever stood in a kitchen holding a box, run a thumb along the flap, and felt something they couldn't name.